“Irrational Belief…

What do you think of the following words?

Should have….
Supposed to …
Have to ….
Will be ….

At one go if a person were to be asked if they have an “Irrational Belief” the question would be answered with a big and concrete NO..NO …
But when it is well explained and looked deep into person Irrational Belief do lurk in them and it do impact their lives to a certain expect but what matters is how much it impacts a person though !

Many too when said Irrational Belief, they seem to understand on what is said of superstitious such as the black cat crossings, dreaming of a snake etc. but those are clear cut irrational beliefs which are known and it does not affect the daily lives as much as the hidden irrational belief which develops inside a person as a system

Thanks to Albert Ellis who came out with the helpful theory focused on Irrational Belief and how it affects the individuals in their daily lives and also Ellis had come up with a great theory on how to deal with issues pertaining this irrational belief system which is called the Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy (REBT)

Irrational belief works in a way where when someone preoccupy their mind that the matter dealt with is supposed to be in the way which he / she had learned and knew it should be i.e. conditioning the mind in normal terms it is taking things for granted for an example study the scenario below;

Amy is stressed, when asked why she is stressed, her answer;

Amy: I am stressed because my father doesn’t seem to understand me, he never allowed me to go for the movies with my friends
Buddy: You said he doesn’t understand you just because he don’t allow you for the movies ?
Amy: Yup he should know how much I want to go for a movie with my friends; He should understand my feelings and respect it ….

Now what you think of Amy’s statement? If you think the father should understand her then you are on the same boat with Amy perhaps!

The catch here is Amy’s last sentence … Note the word Should if you were to answer sincerely do you think the father SHOULD KNOW HOW MUCH ANY WANTS TO GO TO THE MOVIE and the father SHOULD UNDERSTAND HER FEELINGS ?

This is Amy’s irrational belief whereby she preoccupies a belief that her father should know how eager she is to watch the movie and how her feeling is when not allowed, now the father being a total different individual with a totally different roles and experience would not know what she feels nor how eager she is unless she takes her time to explain it clearly to her father but pre believing he would do so and when turned down is her mistake and the stress she is having is a result from her very own self irrational belief mixed up with emotions …

Now this how many of us are caught up with irrational beliefs and we had made it a system to think and react by saying it should, it must, supposedly, It would have, by right… by all this we are affirming and reacting to an irrational belief which satisfy the self-pity and negative emotions and in the end it makes one to feel in despair nor disappointed. Who should the blame go to?

Many must first identify the irrational beliefs they are living with and rectify them by disputing in prior only then the truth can be accepted and digested to attain the feeling of life is fair and just and this would provide a way out from stress, emotional pains, disappointments, resentments etc.

The next time when the word should, must, supposedly etc. is used ensure to justify it without self-interest and used it genuinely and not to reaffirm the irrational beliefs preoccupying matters which is beyond our control according to our personal wanting and understanding is an act of unjust which lands the self in disappointment ...